Breakups. They are tough.
When you’re going through a difficult breakup it's only natural to wonder if there's a chance of reconciling with your ex. But if your former partner is exhibiting certain behaviors or if the reasons behind the breakup were significant, it may be time to face the harsh reality that they may never come back.
In this blog post, we'll explore the key signs your ex will never come back for a reunion, and what you can do to move forward.
Table of Contents
What were the reasons behind the breakup
One of the key factors to consider when trying to determine if your ex will come back is understanding the reasons behind the breakup.
While it's not always easy to pinpoint the exact cause of a breakup, understanding the underlying issues can give you a better sense of whether there is hope for reconciliation. Some common causes of breakups include:
Lack of communication
When couples stop communicating effectively, it can create distance and misunderstandings that can lead to a breakup. If your ex cited a lack of communication as a reason for the breakup, it may be a sign that they are not interested in reconciling.
After all, it would be very hard to prove that your communication skills have improved during this time you’ve been separated.
Differences in values or goals
If your ex feels that you are incompatible in terms of your values or goals, it can be difficult to see a future together. For example, if one person wants to get married and start a family while the other is not ready for those commitments, it can be a significant point of contention.
Infidelity can be a deal breaker for many couples, and it can be difficult to rebuild trust after such a betrayal. If your ex cited infidelity as a reason for the breakup, it may be a sign that they are not interested in giving the relationship another chance.
Infidelity is often too big an obstacle for a couple to get back together.
Of course, every relationship is different, and there may be other factors at play that contributed to the breakup. However, by understanding the reasons behind the breakup, you can get a better sense of whether there is hope for reconciliation and what steps you may need to take to get back together.
Examining your ex’s behavior
Next up you have to look at your ex’s behavior since the breakup. While it's normal to feel a range of emotions after a breakup, certain behaviors can be indicative of a lack of interest in reconciling.
These are some of the biggest signs to show your ex will never come back.
Ignoring your texts or calls
If your ex is consistently ignoring your attempts to communicate, it may be a sign that they are not interested in reconciling.
Constantly messaging your ex is also a huge turn off. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that they’ll miraculously see the light and get back with you if you keep messaging. A period of no contact is recommended instead, but make sure you implement it the right way.
Moving on to a new relationship
If your ex has already started dating someone else, it would be very hard to see them getting back together with you. Although not impossible, as they could be using this new person as a rebound while they recover from the breakup, but rebounds can last a while before they fade away.
Expressing a lack of interest in getting back together
If your ex has explicitly stated that they are not interested in reconciling, it may be a strong indication that they have moved on. Again, this isn’t 100% of the time, as they could be testing your resolve.
Telling friends they’re not interested
If you have mutual friends who are in contact with your ex, and they come back with reports saying they’re just not interested in getting back together, that’s a pretty bad sign.
Mutual friends are who your ex will confide in and usually they’ll tell them the honest truth to let off steam.
They return your stuff
If they’ve returned your stuff it’s a pretty damning sign your ex will never come back. Returning items is a painful but necessary process. If they’ve already pulled out your old hoodie and packed them into a box to give back to you then they’re probably thinking of trying to move on with a life without you.
They move away
A huge sign that the relationship is over for good is if they move away. Moving away is a huge life decision, not one to be taken lightly. This will involve being away from the usual friends, family and work that they’ve been used to in previous years. It’s a big sign that they’re looking for a fresh start. And it would make it very difficult to get back together if they’ve moved out of town.
They avoid your family
If you’ve been together for a while then it’s possible you are close with each other’s families. You might have the phone numbers of some of their family members, or be included in Whatsapp groups.
If they’ve gone cold to your family recently, by not replying or leaving these different group chats on apps then they’re trying to distance themselves from you and the memories.
They block you on social media
If an ex is serious about not getting back together they usually go down the route of blocking on social media. Afterall, if you’re moving on for good why would you want to be reminded of your ex when you see their pictures pop up on social media feeds.
Keeping the line of communication open on social media could indicate they haven’t closed the door on the relationship completely. Alternatively if they’ve blocked you on all channels, that’s a pretty bad sign.
They don’t show jealousy
Jealousy is a natural reaction when you see that your ex is out and about, doing fun things with different people. Even if you’re not together anymore, it takes some getting used to when you see or hear that they’re out having fun without you.
However if your ex knows that you’re out partying on a Friday night and you were spotted chatting with your cute coworker, but they don’t show any signs of jealousy, that could mean their heart just isn’t involved in the relationship anymore.
They got married
This should probably go without saying. If your ex got married in the time that you’ve been broken up, they’re probably not coming back.
Your ex is mean to you
If you’re still interacting with them but you notice they’re particularly mean to you, then they might not be thinking of reconciliation. Of course, they could also be doing this as they’re still emotional and angry about how the breakup happened, this would depend entirely on the situation you were in and the reason you broke up.
Your conversations are dull
Perhaps even worse than them being mean to you. If conversations with your ex are dull and lifeless, they probably aren’t putting much effort into things. And this is a huge sign that it’s over for good.
They’ve adopted a new lifestyle
If you’ve seen that their lifestyle has completely changed since the breakup then they could be gone for good. They could be hanging around with new friends, going to new places, booking holidays in unique locations. This would indicate they’re ready to move on and start a new chapter of their life.
Of course, it's important to keep in mind that people's feelings and behaviors can change over time, and it's possible that your ex may come around in the future. But if you’ve fallen into the trap of doing all the wrong things to get them back - including being needy and emotional - then you’re making their mind up for them.
Assessing your own actions
In addition to examining your ex's behavior after the breakup, it's also important to assess your own actions. While it's natural to want to win your ex back, certain behaviors can actually push them further away rather than draw them closer.
Here are some common behaviors that may push your ex away:
Begging for their forgiveness
While it's understandable to want to apologize and make things right, constantly begging for your ex's forgiveness can be emotionally draining for both parties and may actually push them further away.
You want to portray an image of someone who is strong and in control of their emotions. This is what attracted them to you in the first place. No amount of begging is going to make them change their minds.
Trying to control their behavior
If you are trying to control your ex's behavior or dictate how they should feel or act, it may be a sign of insecurity or a lack of trust in the relationship. This can be a turn-off for your ex and may push them further away.
Not giving them space
It's important to give your ex the space and time they need to process their emotions after a breakup. If you are constantly trying to contact them or insert yourself into their life, you may be coming across as needy or overbearing, which can push them further away.
Going through a period of no contact is good for you and for the chances of getting your ex back.
By assessing your own actions and ensuring that you are not engaging in behaviors that may push your ex away, you can improve your chances of reconciling. Instead, try to focus on improving yourself and finding healthy ways to cope with the end of the relationship. This can help you move forward in a positive direction and lay the foundation for a brighter future.
The importance of self care
After a breakup, it's crucial to prioritize self-care in order to heal and move forward. Here are some key aspects of self-care to consider:
Taking time to grieve
Breakups can be emotionally painful, and it's important to allow yourself the time and space to process your emotions. This may involve crying, talking to a therapist or trusted friend, or engaging in activities that bring you comfort and joy.
It's important to establish healthy boundaries with your ex after a breakup. This may involve limiting contact or setting clear boundaries around what you are and are not comfortable with. By setting boundaries, you can protect your emotional well-being and give yourself the space you need to heal.
Finding healthy ways to cope
There are many healthy ways to cope with the pain of a breakup, such as engaging in physical activity, practicing mindfulness or meditation, or finding supportive friends or family members to talk to. Experiment with different coping strategies to find what works best for you.
By prioritizing self-care, you can begin to heal and move forward after a breakup. This can be a difficult process, but by taking care of yourself, you can lay the foundation for a happier and healthier future.
That helps you to get control of your emotions, increase your value and give yourself the best chance of reconciliation.
Offering advice for moving on
While it's natural to hold onto hope that your ex will come back, it's important to be prepared for the possibility that they may not. If your ex's behavior and the reasons behind the breakup suggest that they have moved on, it may be time to start considering ways to move forward and let go of the relationship.
Here are some tips for moving on after a breakup:
Find ways to improve yourself
Take this opportunity to focus on yourself and work on areas of your life that you may have neglected during the relationship. This could involve pursuing new hobbies, setting personal goals, or working on self-improvement projects.
Focus on your own goals and interests
After a breakup, it's common to feel a sense of loss or a lack of direction. By focusing on your own goals and interests, you can begin to rebuild your sense of purpose and move forward in a positive direction.
Find healthy ways to deal with the pain
Breakups can be emotionally painful, and it's important to find healthy ways to cope with the pain. This may involve talking to a therapist or trusted friend, engaging in physical activity, or finding creative outlets for your emotions.
By finding ways to improve yourself, focusing on your own goals and interests, and finding healthy ways to deal with the pain of the breakup, you can begin to heal and move forward in a positive direction. While it may be difficult to let go of the relationship, by doing so, you can lay the foundation for a happier and healthier future.
How to get your ex back
Breakups are never easy, but by understanding the reasons behind the breakup, examining your ex's behavior, assessing your own actions, prioritizing self-care, and finding healthy ways to move on, you can begin to heal and create a brighter future for yourself.
If you can’t spot many of the signs above but are still struggling to get your ex back, consider checking out The Breakup Blueprint. We’ve built a comprehensive guide to getting your ex girlfriend back. With practical tips and real-life examples for increasing your value and building attraction, The Breakup Blueprint will give you the tools you need to understand what went wrong in your relationship and how to make things right again.
Don't let your ex slip through your fingers - get your copy of The Breakup Blueprint today and take control of your love life.