The term “alpha male” seems to have turned into a dirty word in the last 15 years. Often used as a way to insult strong men who know what they want from life, being alpha is now frowned upon and most people don’t even understand the true meaning of the term.
But don’t get confused. The same women who complain about the alpha male and talk about how much they want a “nice guy”, are the same women going home with them every weekend.
Men with alpha male traits tend to win far more often than not, and women are attracted to men who share many of these characteristics.
Whether you’re in a romantic partnership, a friendship, or a professional relationship, understanding the traits of an alpha male can help you to become a more effective communicator, leader, and partner.
In this article, we’ll explore the key traits of alpha males in relationships, including confidence, leadership, assertiveness, decisiveness, and emotional intelligence.
But first, we’ll go over some common questions when it comes to alpha males.
Table of Contents
What is an alpha male?
The term "alpha male" is often used to describe a man who displays certain dominant and assertive characteristics. These characteristics include confidence, leadership, decisiveness, and emotional intelligence.
The concept of the alpha male has its roots in the study of animal behavior, specifically in the social hierarchies of wolves and primates. In these species, the alpha male is the leader of the pack, the one who holds the most power and status.
In human society, the term "alpha male" is often used to describe men who exhibit similar dominant characteristics. These men are often seen as confident, ambitious, and successful in their personal and professional lives. You could say they’re the "top dogs" in their social circles, respected by those around them.
What do alpha males want in a relationship?
Alpha males have their own unique preferences and desires in a partner. However, there are certain characteristics that are associated with what alpha males tend to look for in a woman.
First and foremost, alpha males tend to be attracted to confidence and independence in a woman. They want a partner who is self-assured and able to stand up for herself, as this can be a turn-on and also a sign of a healthy and balanced relationship.
Another trait that alpha males tend to value in a woman is intelligence and ambition. They want a partner who is driven, motivated, and has goals of her own, as this can be a sign of a compatible and stimulating relationship.
Additionally, alpha males tend to be attracted to femininity and traditional gender roles in a woman. They tend to appreciate women who embrace their femininity and know how to take care of their appearance, while also being comfortable with traditional gender roles.
Lastly, alpha males tend to be attracted to a woman who is emotionally stable and can handle stress and challenges. They want a partner who can be a source of support and strength, and who can navigate conflicts and challenges in a healthy and effective way.
Be sure to check out our article on Alpha Males and Alpha Females in relationships, where we go into detail about how they can get along.
How does an alpha male treat his woman?
An alpha male tends to be confident, assertive, and protective in his behavior towards his partner.
Communication with partners is a high priority, expressing thoughts and feelings in a direct and honest manner. They tend to be decisive and take the lead in decision-making and problem-solving, which can bring a sense of direction and purpose to the relationship.
He also tends to be protective of his partner, and will often go to great lengths to ensure her safety and well-being. He may also be generous with her, and provide her with the financial and emotional support she needs.
An alpha male also tends to be romantic and affectionate, and will often go out of his way to make his partner feel special and loved. He may also be a good listener and will try to understand his partner's needs, thoughts and feelings.
Now, onto the key traits of alpha males in relationships.
Traits of alpha males in relationships
Confidence
Confidence is a key trait of alpha males, and it’s often seen as a key component of assertive and dominant behavior. Confidence can be defined as a belief in one's abilities, qualities, and judgment. Alpha males tend to possess a high level of self-confidence, which allows them to approach challenges and obstacles with a sense of self-assurance and determination.
Alpha males tend to have a healthy level of confidence that allows them to lead and make decisions, but also to be sensitive to the needs and feelings of their partners.
One of the key ways that confidence affects relationships is through communication. Confident individuals tend to express themselves clearly and assertively, which can make them more effective communicators. This can be beneficial for both partners, as it allows for open and honest communication, which can help to build trust and intimacy.
Confidence can also affect relationships through leadership. Confident individuals tend to take the lead in decision-making, and they can be effective leaders in both personal and professional contexts. This can be beneficial for relationships, as it allows for clear direction and a sense of purpose. However, it's important for the other partner to feel comfortable and in agreement with those decisions.
Overall, confidence is a key trait of alpha males, and it can have a positive impact on relationships when it is balanced with sensitivity and communication. It is important for both partners to work together to build a healthy level of confidence and to understand how it affects the relationship dynamics.
Leadership
Leadership is another common trait of alpha males, as they are often seen as natural leaders in both personal and professional contexts. Leadership can be defined as the ability to guide, direct, and inspire others towards a common goal. Alpha males tend to possess strong leadership skills, which allow them to take charge and guide others towards success.
In relationships, leadership can manifest in a variety of ways. Alpha males tend to be the ones who initiate and plan activities and events, and they often make decisions for the couple. They also tend to take the lead in problem-solving and decision-making, which can be beneficial for the relationship as it can bring a sense of direction and purpose.
Leadership can also be a positive trait in relationships because it can foster trust and respect. When one partner takes the lead and makes decisions, it can give the other partner a sense of security and stability, which can be beneficial for building trust and respect.
One thing we’d like to note is that leadership does not always mean domination, it should be a collaboration between the partners. When one partner always makes decisions and leads the way, it can lead to feelings of resentment and power imbalance. To balance the leadership in a relationship, it's important for both partners to communicate and discuss their needs, feelings and opinions. A true alpha male knows this.
Additionally, leadership can be a positive trait in relationships when it's combined with emotional intelligence and sensitivity. Alpha males who are able to lead while also being aware of their partner's feelings and needs can foster a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.
Assertiveness
Another key trait of alpha males is assertiveness. This refers to the ability to express one's own needs, wants, and opinions in a direct and confident manner. Assertiveness is seen as a positive trait, as it allows men to communicate effectively and stand up for themselves in a respectful manner.
In relationships, assertiveness can play a positive role by allowing partners to express their needs and wants, and to negotiate and compromise in a healthy way. It also allows partners to advocate for themselves, which can lead to a more balanced and fulfilling relationship.
Assertiveness is not the same as aggression. Assertiveness is about expressing oneself in a direct and confident way, while still being respectful of others. Aggression, on the other hand, is about imposing one's will on others, often using force or intimidation.
In addition, assertiveness can be balanced by practicing empathy and understanding. Alpha males who are able to be assertive while also being aware of their partner's feelings and needs can foster a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.
Overall, assertiveness is a trait of alpha males and can be a positive trait in relationships when balanced with empathy, understanding, and effective communication. It's important for both partners to work together to find a balance of assertiveness that works for both of them.
Decisiveness
Decisiveness refers to the ability to make clear and confident decisions. Alpha males are often known for their ability to make quick and effective decisions, which can be beneficial in both personal and professional contexts.
In relationships, decisiveness plays a positive role by allowing partners to make decisions and take action in a timely manner, which can bring a sense of direction and purpose to the relationship. It also allows partners to navigate conflicts and challenges effectively.
Decisiveness does not always mean domination. It's important for both partners to communicate and discuss their needs, feelings, and opinions before making any decision, so it can be a mutual and fair one.
One way to balance decisiveness in a relationship is through effective communication and active listening. When partners are able to make decisions in a timely manner while also being open to hearing and understanding their partner's perspective, it can lead to a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.
Emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage one's own emotions and the emotions of others. It’s a trait that is often associated with alpha males, as they are seen as being able to navigate complex social situations with ease and grace.
In relationships, emotional intelligence can play a positive role by allowing partners to understand and navigate their own emotions as well as their partner's emotions. Emotionally intelligent partners are also more likely to be empathetic and understanding, which can foster a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.
Moreover, emotional intelligence can also play a role in decision making, as it allows partners to take into account the emotional implications of their decisions, which can help to avoid conflicts and misunderstandings.
One way to develop emotional intelligence in a relationship is through self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy and social skills. These are five key components of emotional intelligence. When partners are able to understand and manage their emotions, as well as empathize and communicate with their partner, it can lead to a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.
Overall, emotional intelligence is a trait of alpha males and can be a positive trait in relationships. It allows partners to navigate their emotions and the emotions of others in a way that fosters understanding, empathy, and effective communication. It's important for both partners to work together to develop their emotional intelligence, in order to improve the relationship dynamics.
Alpha male relationship psychology
If you're interested in learning more about this topic, check out our guide to alpha male relationship psychology, where we go into more detail.
Alpha males in relationships
The traits of alpha males in relationships include confidence, leadership, assertiveness, decisiveness, and emotional intelligence. Understanding and respecting these traits in relationships can lead to better communication, problem-solving, and conflict resolution.
Not everyone is born with these qualities. Men can become alpha males by focusing on their own personal development and learning to cultivate these traits.
Ultimately, becoming an alpha male is about personal growth and self-improvement. It's about understanding and respecting one's own needs, wants, and opinions while also being open to hearing and understanding the needs, wants, and opinions of others. By focusing on growing and building these traits, men can become more effective leaders, communicators, and partners in their relationships.
