texts to send your ex after no contact

Texts to Send Your Ex After No Contact: The Power of Words

Breaking up with someone we once cared deeply about is an emotionally challenging experience.

It often leads us to question our decisions, revisit cherished memories, and contemplate the possibility of a second chance. 

If you find yourself in this situation, where you've utilized a period of no contact to heal and gain clarity, you may be considering reaching out to your ex. But how do you navigate this delicate territory with grace and intention?

In this article, we explore the art of reconnecting through text messages after a period of no contact. 

We understand that the journey to rekindling a relationship requires careful thought, self-reflection, and open communication. 

Our aim is to guide you through this process, providing you with examples of texts that can convey your feelings effectively while maintaining respect and understanding.

So before you hit that send button, make sure you read our guide below for texts to send your ex after no contact.

Table of Contents

Understanding the Purpose of Contacting Your Ex

Clarity and self reflection

Before you consider initiating contact with your ex after a period of no contact, it is crucial to prioritize clarity and self-reflection. Here's why it is important:

Assessing Your Intentions: Take the time to understand your motivations and intentions behind wanting to reconnect. Are you seeking genuine reconciliation and a healthy relationship, or are you driven by loneliness, fear of being alone, or a desire to relive the past? It's essential to be honest with yourself and ensure that your intentions are rooted in emotional well-being and growth.

Evaluating Relationship Patterns: Self-reflection allows you to examine the patterns and dynamics that existed in your past relationship. Take an objective look at the issues and challenges that contributed to the breakup. Identify your role in those patterns and consider how you can address and improve upon them if given the opportunity to reconnect.

Assessing Personal Growth: During the no contact period, you have the opportunity to focus on personal growth and self-improvement. Reflect on the progress you have made, the lessons you have learned, and the changes you have implemented in your life. Assess whether you are in a better place emotionally, mentally, and personally than when the breakup occurred. This self-assessment will help you determine if you are ready to engage in a healthier relationship moving forward.

Clarifying Boundaries and Expectations: Before reaching out to your ex, establish clear boundaries and expectations for yourself. Consider what you are willing to accept and what you require in a future relationship. Be prepared to communicate your boundaries effectively and listen to your ex's boundaries as well. Clarity in this aspect will prevent misunderstandings and ensure that you prioritize your emotional well-being.


By prioritizing clarity and self-reflection before initiating contact, you set a solid foundation for the next phase of your interaction with your ex. 

This helps you approach the situation with a greater understanding of yourself, your intentions, and your boundaries. Remember, this process is about personal growth and well-being, and the decision to reconnect should align with your own emotional health and happiness.

Evaluating the true intentions for wanting your ex back

When considering the prospect of getting your ex back, try to evaluate your true intentions and motivations with honesty and self-awareness. 

Understanding why you want them back will help you make informed decisions and navigate the complexities of rekindling a relationship. Here's why evaluating your intentions is crucial:

Emotional Clarity: Take a step back and reflect on your emotions. Are you longing for your ex out of genuine love and a desire for a healthy, fulfilling relationship? Or are you driven by nostalgia, fear of being alone, or a sense of familiarity? It's important to differentiate between true affection and temporary emotions that may cloud your judgment. Consider whether your feelings are rooted in a genuine desire to reconnect with your ex for the right reasons.

Past Relationship Evaluation: Evaluate the dynamics of your past relationship. Were there fundamental issues or patterns that contributed to the breakup? Be honest with yourself about the challenges you faced as a couple. It's important to assess whether those issues have been resolved or if you are simply longing for the comfort of the past. Take into account whether you and your ex have grown individually and if the necessary changes have been made to foster a healthier relationship.

Personal Growth and Development: Use the period of no contact to focus on personal growth and self-improvement. Consider the progress you have made during this time and the lessons you have learned. Reflect on how you have evolved as an individual and whether you are in a better emotional and mental state than when the breakup occurred. Evaluate whether you have addressed any personal issues or behaviors that may have contributed to the breakup. It's important to ensure that your desire to reconnect stems from personal growth and a readiness for a healthier relationship.

Long-Term Compatibility: Assess the long-term compatibility between you and your ex. Consider your shared values, goals, and aspirations. Reflect on whether your visions for the future align and whether you can overcome the challenges that led to the breakup. It's crucial to determine if your reasons for wanting your ex back are rooted in a belief that you can build a strong, lasting relationship together.

Communication and Resolution: Before initiating contact with your ex, consider whether there are unresolved issues that need to be addressed. Reflect on whether both parties are willing to engage in open, honest communication and work towards resolving past conflicts. It's important to evaluate whether you are seeking reconciliation as a means of avoiding confrontation or if you genuinely believe that constructive dialogue can lead to a stronger relationship.

Preparing Yourself for Reconnecting

Emotional vulnerability

Reaching out to your ex after a period of no contact requires acknowledging the emotional vulnerability that comes with it. 

Understand that putting yourself out there and expressing your desire to reconnect leaves you open to potential rejection or disappointment. Recognize that your feelings may be met with a range of responses from your ex, and prepare yourself for various outcomes. 


It's important to be emotionally prepared and resilient, understanding that you are taking a risk by reaching out and that the response you receive may not always align with your expectations. 

By acknowledging and accepting your emotional vulnerability, you can approach reaching out to your ex with a greater sense of self-awareness and readiness to handle whatever may come your way.

Go in with self-confidence and self-care

Before thinking of texts to send your ex after no contact, it is crucial to cultivate self-confidence and prioritize self-care. Here's why:

Self-Confidence: Building self-confidence is essential because it allows you to approach the situation from a position of strength and self-assuredness. Recognize your own worth and value as an individual, independent of your relationship status. Cultivate self-assurance by focusing on your positive qualities, accomplishments, and personal growth. Confidence will not only make the process of reaching out easier but will also increase your chances of a positive outcome. Remember, you deserve to be treated with respect and to pursue a fulfilling relationship.

Emotional Resilience: Reaching out to your ex can stir up various emotions, including anxiety, fear, and uncertainty. Prioritize self-care and emotional well-being during this time. Engage in activities that bring you joy, practice self-reflection and mindfulness, and surround yourself with supportive people. Taking care of yourself emotionally will help you navigate any potential challenges or setbacks with resilience and a clearer state of mind.

Independence and Personal Growth: Focus on your own personal growth and independence during the no contact period. Rediscover your passions, set and achieve personal goals, and invest time in self-improvement. This process allows you to become the best version of yourself, which not only boosts self-confidence but also enhances your overall attractiveness. It's important to show your ex that you are thriving and fulfilled on your own, creating an environment where a healthy and balanced reconnection can occur.

Setting Boundaries: Prioritize setting and maintaining healthy boundaries throughout the process. Be clear about your own needs, desires, and deal-breakers in a relationship. This self-awareness and self-respect will guide your actions and ensure that you approach the reconnection from a position of strength. By setting boundaries, you establish a framework for a healthier relationship moving forward.

Remember, self-confidence and self-care are not just prerequisites for reconnecting with your ex, but they are also vital for your overall well-being. 

Embrace your own worth, focus on personal growth, and prioritize your emotional health. By doing so, you increase your chances of a successful reconnection and set the stage for a healthier, more fulfilling relationship if that is the path you choose to pursue.

Choosing the Right Texts to Send

Using a positive and respectful tone in all interactions

When reaching out to your ex after a period of no contact, maintaining a positive and respectful tone is essential. Here's why it holds significant importance:

Open Lines of Communication: Approaching the conversation with a positive tone creates a welcoming and open environment for communication. It sets the stage for healthy dialogue and encourages your ex to feel comfortable expressing their thoughts and feelings. By being respectful and positive, you create an atmosphere conducive to understanding and potential resolution.

Rebuilding Trust and Respect: If the breakup was accompanied by conflict or hurt feelings, demonstrating a respectful tone can help rebuild trust and repair any damage done. It shows your ex that you value their perspective, feelings, and boundaries. By approaching the conversation in a positive and respectful manner, you can set a foundation for rebuilding trust and fostering a healthier connection.

Reflecting Emotional Maturity: A positive and respectful tone reflects emotional maturity and self-control. It shows that you have taken the time to reflect on your emotions and are approaching the situation with a level-headed mindset. This demonstrates growth and indicates that you are ready for a healthier and more constructive interaction.

Effective Communication: Maintaining a positive and respectful tone enhances the effectiveness of your communication. It allows you to express your thoughts and feelings in a clear and calm manner, reducing the risk of misunderstandings or escalating conflicts. By choosing your words carefully and focusing on a positive tone, you increase the likelihood of productive and meaningful communication.

Preserving Dignity and Self-Respect: Regardless of the outcome of the conversation, maintaining a positive and respectful tone preserves your dignity and self-respect. It shows that you value yourself and expect to be treated with respect in return. By setting this standard for how you engage in communication, you establish healthy boundaries and contribute to the overall well-being of both parties involved.

Remember, maintaining a positive and respectful tone doesn't guarantee a specific outcome, but it significantly improves the quality of your interactions. By approaching the conversation with respect, emotional maturity, and effective communication, you lay the groundwork for a healthier relationship moving forward, whether that involves reconciling or moving on.

Examples of texts to send the ex

When reaching out to an ex after a period of no contact, it's important to strike a balance between being friendly, genuine, and respectful. 

We’ve compiled these examples that can serve as a starting point for texts to send your ex after no contact:

Example 1

Text example 1: "Hey [Ex's Name], hope you're doing well. I came across something today that reminded me of our fun times together. It made me smile. Just wanted to say hi and see how you've been."

This text can be a useful way to initiate contact after a period of no contact for several reasons:

It's friendly and non-threatening: By starting the text with a warm greeting and expressing genuine concern for your ex's well-being, you create a friendly tone. This approach helps avoid any confrontational or aggressive vibes that could potentially push your ex away.

It shows positive reminiscence: Mentioning that you stumbled upon something that reminded you of the fun times you shared helps create a positive association. It conveys that you still have pleasant memories of the relationship and that those memories brought you joy.


It's non-committal: The text doesn't impose any expectations or demands on your ex. It simply aims to initiate a friendly conversation and catch up. By keeping it light and open-ended, you allow your ex to respond at their own pace and comfort level.

It demonstrates thoughtfulness: By taking the time to reach out and let your ex know that they crossed your mind, you show that you've been reflecting on the relationship and value the connection you had. This can help your ex perceive your intentions as genuine and sincere.

It leaves room for their response: Ending the text by expressing a desire to see how they've been indicates that you're genuinely interested in reconnecting. By leaving the ball in their court, you give your ex the opportunity to respond if they feel comfortable doing so.

Overall, this text aims to create a friendly and open atmosphere for reconnecting. It conveys your positive sentiments, while also respecting your ex's autonomy and boundaries. By starting with a light-hearted approach, you increase the likelihood of sparking a conversation and potentially re-establishing a connection.

Example 2

Text example 2: "Hi [Ex's Name], I hope life has been treating you kindly. I've been reflecting on our past recently and wanted to let you know that I appreciate the time we spent together. If you ever want to catch up, I'm here."

This text can be useful for initiating contact with your ex after a period of no contact for the following reasons:

It conveys goodwill and empathy: By expressing your hopes for your ex's well-being, you demonstrate genuine concern and empathy. This approach shows that you still care about their happiness and acknowledges the importance of their life outside of the relationship.

It acknowledges the past positively: By reflecting on the past and expressing appreciation for the time you spent together, you're showing your ex that you value the relationship. This sentiment can help create a positive context for reconnecting and remind them of the positive aspects of the past.

It leaves the door open for communication: By mentioning that you're open to catching up, you provide an invitation for your ex to reach out if they're interested. This approach puts the decision to reconnect in their hands, giving them the freedom to respond if they feel comfortable doing so.

It signals personal growth and reflection: By mentioning that you've been reflecting on the past, you demonstrate personal growth and self-awareness. This can show your ex that you've taken time to evaluate the relationship and have potentially made positive changes during the no-contact period.

It maintains a non-pressure approach: The text doesn't impose any expectations or demands. It simply extends an offer to reconnect, leaving the decision up to your ex. This approach respects their autonomy and allows them to respond on their own terms.

By combining empathy, appreciation, and an open invitation to reconnect, this text aims to create a positive and non-confrontational atmosphere. It acknowledges the past while leaving room for your ex to respond if they're interested in reconnecting.

Example 3

Text example 3: "Hey [Ex's Name], it's been a while since we last spoke. I wanted to reach out and see if we could have a friendly chat sometime. No pressure, just thought it might be nice to reconnect as friends if you're open to it."

This text can be useful for initiating contact with your ex after a period of no contact for the following reasons:

It acknowledges the passage of time: By mentioning that it has been a while since you last spoke, you acknowledge the space that has existed between you and your ex. This shows that you respect the period of no contact and are mindful of the time that has passed since the breakup.

It suggests a friendly conversation: The text explicitly states that you would like to have a friendly chat. By emphasizing the friendly nature of the interaction, you make it clear that your intention is not to rekindle the romantic relationship immediately. This approach helps reduce any pressure or expectation your ex might feel.

It expresses openness to reconnecting as friends: By mentioning the possibility of reconnecting as friends, you convey that you are open to exploring a new dynamic with your ex. This approach can help create a foundation for rebuilding trust and connection, as it removes the expectation of immediately resuming a romantic relationship.

It emphasizes a no-pressure approach: By stating that there is no pressure and that you are simply reaching out to see if they are open to reconnecting, you give your ex the freedom to respond without feeling obligated. This approach respects their autonomy and allows them to make their own decision about whether they want to engage in further communication.

It communicates a genuine desire to reconnect: The text conveys your genuine interest in reconnecting with your ex. By expressing your desire to chat, you show that you value the connection you had and are open to exploring the possibility of rebuilding a positive relationship.

By acknowledging the passage of time, suggesting a friendly chat, expressing openness to reconnecting as friends, maintaining a no-pressure approach, and communicating genuine interest, this text aims to create a comfortable and low-pressure atmosphere for reconnecting with your ex. It allows them to respond based on their own comfort level and interest, facilitating open communication and potential reconnection.

Example 4

Text example 4: "Hi [Ex's Name], I hope you've been doing well since we last spoke. I recently accomplished a personal goal I set for myself, and it made me think of the support you used to offer. Just wanted to share the news and say thanks for being a part of my journey."

This text can be useful for initiating contact with your ex after a period of no contact for the following reasons:

Shows genuine interest in their well-being: By expressing your hope that they've been doing well since you last spoke, you demonstrate genuine concern for their happiness and overall state. This approach conveys that you still care about their well-being, even after the breakup.

Shares personal growth and accomplishment: By mentioning that you recently achieved a personal goal, you showcase your own growth and development. This can be a subtle way to communicate that you have been working on yourself during the no-contact period and have made positive strides.

Highlights their past support: By stating that your achievement reminded you of the support they used to offer, you acknowledge and appreciate their past involvement in your life. This approach can help evoke positive memories and emotions, reminding them of the meaningful connection you shared.

Expresses gratitude: By saying thanks for being a part of your journey, you convey a sense of gratitude for their presence and impact in your life. This expression of gratitude can create a positive and warm tone, fostering a potential reconnection built on positive sentiment.

Initiates a casual conversation: The text serves as an opportunity to share personal news in a friendly and non-threatening manner. It invites your ex to engage in a conversation without putting pressure on them or creating expectations of rekindling the relationship immediately.

By showing genuine interest, sharing personal growth, highlighting past support, expressing gratitude, and initiating a casual conversation, this text aims to create a positive and non-confrontational atmosphere for reconnecting. It allows for the opportunity to engage in friendly conversation, potentially reigniting the connection and opening the door for further communication and exploration of the relationship.

Example 5

Text example 5: "Hey [Ex's Name], I was cleaning out my closet and stumbled upon something that reminded me of you. It brought back some good memories. I hope you're doing great and would love to catch up if you're open to it."

This text can be useful for initiating contact with your ex after a period of no contact for the following reasons:

Evokes positive memories: By mentioning that you stumbled upon something that reminded you of your ex, you bring up positive memories from the past. This approach can help create a nostalgic and sentimental tone, fostering a sense of connection and shared history.

Shows genuine interest in their well-being: By expressing the hope that they're doing great, you demonstrate genuine concern for their happiness and overall state. This approach conveys that you still care about their well-being and are interested in their current life situation.

Expresses openness to catch up: By stating that you would love to catch up, you extend an invitation for further conversation and potential reconnection. This shows your willingness to reconnect and engage in friendly communication without any immediate expectations.

Demonstrates thoughtfulness: By mentioning that the item you found brought back good memories, you convey that you have been reflecting on the past and have positive associations with the relationship. This thoughtfulness can help your ex perceive your intentions as genuine and sincere.

Maintains a friendly and non-intrusive approach: The text is casual and doesn't impose any pressure or demands. It simply conveys a desire to catch up and leaves the decision to your ex. This approach respects their autonomy and allows them to respond based on their comfort level and interest.

By evoking positive memories, showing genuine interest, expressing openness to catch up, demonstrating thoughtfulness, and maintaining a friendly approach, this text aims to create a warm and inviting atmosphere for reconnecting. 

It opens the door for a friendly conversation, potentially reigniting the connection and creating an opportunity for further communication and exploration of the relationship.

Dealing with Rejection or Unresponsiveness

The possibility of negative outcomes and rejection

While it's natural to hope for a positive response when reaching out to your ex, it's important to prepare yourself for the possibility of negative outcomes or even rejection. Here's why it's crucial to be emotionally equipped for such scenarios:

Managing Expectations: Reconnecting with an ex after no contact is not a guaranteed success. It's important to approach the situation with realistic expectations and understand that the response you receive may not align with your desires. By preparing for the possibility of negative outcomes, you can protect yourself from disappointment and better navigate the situation with emotional resilience.

Emotional Self-Care: Rejection or a negative response can be emotionally challenging. It's crucial to prioritize self-care and have coping mechanisms in place to deal with any potential setbacks. Surround yourself with supportive friends and engage in activities that bring you joy and comfort. Remember that your self-worth is not dependent on the response of your ex, and you have the strength to overcome any emotional hurdles.

Maintaining Dignity and Grace: Even if the outcome is not what you hoped for, it's essential to maintain your dignity and respond with grace. Responding maturely and respectfully, even in the face of rejection, allows you to leave the door open for future possibilities or potential reconciliation down the line. It also reflects your emotional maturity and self-respect.

Personal Growth and Learning: Negative outcomes or rejection can provide valuable opportunities for personal growth and self-reflection. Use these experiences as learning moments to understand yourself better, evaluate your desires and needs, and reassess what you want in a future relationship. Remember that setbacks can often lead to greater self-awareness and pave the way for healthier connections in the future.

By mentally preparing for the possibility of negative outcomes and rejection, you empower yourself to approach the situation with a level-headed mindset and emotional resilience. 

Your worth and happiness are not solely dependent on the response of your ex. Focus on your personal growth, self-care, and maintaining healthy boundaries throughout the process.

Coping with rejection and accepting the situation

Dealing with rejection can be a difficult and emotionally challenging experience, especially when reaching out to an ex after a period of no contact.

It's important to develop healthy coping mechanisms and learn to accept the situation. Here are some strategies to help you navigate rejection and find acceptance:

Allow Yourself to Feel: It's natural to feel a range of emotions, including sadness, disappointment, or even anger, when faced with rejection. Give yourself permission to experience these emotions and acknowledge them without judgment. Suppressing or ignoring your feelings will only prolong the healing process. Embrace them, express them in healthy ways, and use them as fuel for personal growth.

Seek Support: Reach out to your support system during this challenging time. Share your feelings with trusted friends or family members who can provide a listening ear, empathy, and encouragement. Surrounding yourself with a supportive network can help you gain perspective, offer different insights, and remind you of your worth and value beyond the rejection.

Practice Self-Care: Focus on self-care activities that nourish your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy, such as exercising, practicing mindfulness or meditation, pursuing hobbies, or spending time in nature. Prioritize self-care as a way to heal, recharge, and redirect your energy toward personal growth and self-improvement.

Reflect and Learn: Use the experience of rejection as an opportunity for self-reflection and growth. Ask yourself what you can learn from the situation and how it can contribute to your personal development. Reflect on any patterns or behaviors that may have contributed to the rejection and consider how you can make positive changes in the future. Embrace the opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your needs in relationships.

Shift Your Perspective: Instead of dwelling on the rejection, try to shift your perspective and focus on the possibilities that lie ahead. Accept that the situation did not work out as you hoped, but recognize that it opens doors for new opportunities, personal growth, and potentially healthier relationships in the future. Embrace the idea that this rejection may be redirecting you toward something better suited for your happiness and fulfillment.

Practice Acceptance: Acceptance is a powerful tool in healing and moving forward. Acknowledge that you cannot control the response or actions of others, including your ex. Accept the reality of the situation, even if it's not what you desired, and release any attachments or expectations you may have held. Embrace the concept that acceptance is not about defeat but rather about finding peace within yourself and embracing the journey ahead.

Remember, coping with rejection takes time, and everyone's healing process is unique. Be patient with yourself and practice self-compassion throughout the journey. 

By embracing your emotions, seeking support, engaging in self-care, reflecting, shifting your perspective, and practicing acceptance, you can navigate rejection with resilience and open yourself up to new possibilities for growth and happiness.

Texts to Send Your Ex After No Contact

Reconnecting with an ex after a period of no contact is a delicate process that requires careful consideration, self-reflection, and open communication. 

In this article, we have explored the art of sending texts to your ex, providing examples and insights to help you convey your feelings effectively while maintaining respect and understanding.

By creating a welcoming and open environment for communication, you can foster understanding and potentially rebuild trust and respect.

Reconnecting with an ex is a deeply personal journey, and there is no guaranteed outcome. We wish you the best of luck as you navigate this process with courage, self-reflection, and an open heart. 

If you liked this guide check out The Breakup Blueprint, our step-by-step guide to getting your ex back for good.

Or check out our article on whether no contact will work on a stubborn ex.

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